Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
