dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
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