I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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