i just google imaged poop.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize