Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
