You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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