i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize