bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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