There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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