The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
