dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
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My life is pants optional.
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