I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
