i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
if only i could text you this smell
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
