arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
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