Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
