ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
