Quick, to the slutcave!
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize