is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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