only if we run a train.
done.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
and she was petting her beer can
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
