hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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