it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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