Your face is a jimmy john
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
