If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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