i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
