Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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