What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
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