For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
