we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
