So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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