so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
My breasts were aching with rage.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Randomize
