I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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