I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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