Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
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