Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
