remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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