i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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