GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
