I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Randomize
