my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
My breasts were aching with rage.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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