She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize
