OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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