Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
