Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
