someone get that fucking seahorse.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
