she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Randomize
