Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
