so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
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