I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Randomize
