fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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