So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
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Do I have a choice?
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the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
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