R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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