remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
accomplished twins. life is a go
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She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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